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Rohini’s Blog

He Said, She Said: One Year Vlog Anniversary

We are celebrating ?? our one year anniversary of doing the Vlog! Thank you for all of you support and kindness! ?? ? We so appreciate being in this exploration with YOU. It is music to our ears when we here the Vlog has been helpful or even that it has simply brought you a smile. And Angus did realize the song is by Human League and not The Killers. ? Sending you love!   Angus and Rohini are both coaches. They work with individuals, leaders and organizations to increase performance and success. They also love working with couples and helping them reduce conflict and discord so they can...

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Owning Anger to Find More Peace in Marriage

My husband Angus said to me recently that I have not been myself. He said I have had more an edge, been more critical, more impatient, more controlling, and more condescending than usual. What surprised me is that I had not noticed it. I didn't think I was perfect, but I also didn't think I was any different than usual.   We all have our blind spots. Someone might talk over people and not notice it, another person might not listen and still think they are a good listener, for me I often don't see my anger. I notice it in my...

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It Is Not Always Obvious When Opportunity Comes Knocking

Work is love made visible. ~ Kahlil Gibran   I never imagined I would be able to make good money in a sustainable way. Before getting married I was a student who received scholarships to go to school, and then I worked as a model. I did make good money then, but I knew it was a time-limited endeavor. When I got married, I imagined I would work until we had children, and then become a stay-at-home mom. This was definitely something I wanted to do and felt called to do. I also did not see myself as being able to bring...

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He Said, She Said: The Quiet Nest Before the Empty Nest

I am missing spending more time with our teenage girls as their lives are so busy. Angus reminds me of how normal and healthy this is. I see now that my struggle could be perceived as a criticism of them and give the message that they are doing something wrong. My opportunity is to get more comfortable with the quiet nest so they know everything is okay and on track, and to look for the opportunities we do have to enjoy each others company. Angus has an opportunity to accept his bad hair day and not compensate with "hat hair".   Angus...

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Extraordinary Performance Calls For Ordinary Measures

As I prepare for upcoming corporate trainings, I have been reflecting on how, paradoxically, extraordinary results arise from being ordinary. You perform your best when you are being yourself. I love the metaphor of walking across a plank of wood. If you put a plank of wood on the ground that is wide enough to walk across and ask able-bodied people to walk across it, they would have no problem doing so. They would also be able to run, skip, and maybe even cartwheel across it without a second thought. However, if you put that same plank of wood 100 feet...

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He Said, She Said: Getting Comfortable in the Unknown

Life is more fun when we get comfortable being in the unknown. It is funny that we even get uncomfortable because we are all actually living in the unknown moment to moment. But we kid ourselves into thinking that we have a comfort zone, and get uncomfortable when we think we are outside of it. The truth is a comfort zone doesn't exist. It is a made up idea. When we see this, it gets easier being comfortable with what is.   Angus and Rohini are both coaches. They work with individuals, leaders and organizations to increase performance and success. They also...

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In Celebration of Martin Luther King Jr. — Let Love Transform Us All

Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that. -- Martin Luther King, Jr.   Today is Martin Luther King Jr. day in the United States. It is a holiday that commemorates Dr. King's life and work. He lead a movement for racial justice and equality, and embraced nonviolent action as a powerful revolutionary force for social change. He employed Gandhi's philosophy of nonviolence as the means to confront racist laws and discrimination in America. His work made a significant contribution to President Lyndon Johnson signing into law the historic Civil Rights...

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He Said, She Said: Angus’s Big Problem in Our Marriage

Who knew Angus has a big problem with me?! It wasn't what I thought it would be. Of my many character weaknesses and personality quirks it was not on the top of my list. Just goes to show how we each live in our separate reality and see the world in our unique way that makes sense to us. WARNING: view discretion advised.   Angus and Rohini are both coaches. They work with individuals, leaders and organizations to increase performance and success. They also love working with couples and helping them reduce conflict and discord so they can experience more love and...

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Would You Rather Be Happy or Would You Rather Be Free?

You have probably heard the expression, "Would your rather be right or would you rather be happy?" It is a helpful reminder that holding on rigidly to a position creates suffering. However, during this weekend while teaching a workshop, with Dicken Bettinger and Barb Patterson, a different version occurred to me. It was, "Would you rather be happy, or would you rather free?"   For most of my life I focused on happiness and how to get more of it. This created pressure inside of me to not feel certain emotions. I didn't realize my attachment and desire to feeling happy was...

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He Said, She Said: Fighting sucks, but it is not the end of the world

We thought we would get more sleep with teenagers. They don't wake up until noon when they are on vacation, but we forgot the flip side of the late nights. Angus and I were feeling a little worse for wear from lack of sleep, and we really got duped by our reactive thinking. We both fell into believing it, and woke up believing too. That is highly unusual for us now, but it happened nonetheless. We eventually settled. We finally saw each other more clearly, and felt the love that is.   It can be scary when this happens. The intensity of...

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