Anxiety | Rohini Ross

Repressed Emotions vs. Repressing Emotions & Healing

There is a difference between the idea of repressed emotions and the action of consciously or unconsciously repressing emotions. It is unclear what repressed emotions are and where they are found, if anywhere in the body. But we all have probably experienced behavioral habits we use to try and resist our emotions when uncomfortable feelings arise. I have used various techniques to try and feel better, some that I thought were good for me, and some that I knew were bad, but they all made sense when I felt unsafe with my feelings.   This resistance to overwhelming emotional experiences is a...

Read More

The Gift of Taking Things Personally

It feels good when we don’t take things personally in relationships. We enjoy the feelings of inner freedom and goodwill when we feel compassion for our struggling partners when their behavior misses the mark. We enjoy the feelings of internal stability when we are undisturbed by our partners' emotional dysregulation and feel internally stable. This feels good, and it feels bad when we take things personally. We can misinterpret the bad feelings to mean something is wrong with us, or we are doing things wrong. We can judge ourselves as not good enough when we take our partner’s behavior personally,...

Read More

A Very Happy Made-Up New Year to You!

I've noticed a lovely trend in the emails coming into my inbox at this time of year reminding me to take it easy.   The feedback is to go at your own pace. Listen to your inner feedback regarding your boundaries. Slow down. Rest! Remember that time is a construct. Don't let something made up cause you to feel a sense of urgency and make yourself rush. There is no objective time, so you can't be behind. Yes, you can miss deadlines, appointments, and flights, but no matter what, you are always doing the best that you can, and you are more...

Read More

‘Tis the Season of Peace, Goodwill, and Holiday Stress

Angus and our youngest daughter got our Christmas tree last week. I purchased all of the girls stocking stuffers way ahead of time. Even though our daughters are young adults, we all love the Christmas morning ritual of them opening the gifts in their pillowcases. Angus's family used pillowcases rather than stockings. This seemed very practical, so we kept that tradition.   And even though this is the season of peace and goodwill, all of the festivities can come with the experience of extra pressure and holiday stress that can take a toll on health and relationships.   I have experienced internal pressure to...

Read More

Anxiety and Conflict

Angus was very attached to his mattress. It took Rohini ages to convince him to get a new one. However, when Angus was putting the new bed together he found himself getting reactive because he thought the new mattress was no better than a horse mat. Some harsh words were exchanged, but once the mattress had expanded, and Angus and Rohini had stabilized, Angus realized the ego is like a hoarder. It wants to hoard whatever feels familiar because it feels anxious about the unknown. Fortunately, understanding this makes it easier to ignore the ego's hoarding mentality and to have...

Read More

Beating the Algorithm of Anxiety

Angus was introduced to Tik Tok by his daughters and discovered a new metaphor through indulging in his guilty pleasure. Having his feed overrun by fishing videos, helped him see he needed to ignore them in order to shift the algorithm. The same is true for your anxious thoughts. When you don't identify with them, they naturally dissipate. What helps is recognizing the capacity you have to leave your thoughts alone. You already do this naturally. It is not a new skill to learn. It is simply a recognition that you can ignore compelling thoughts just like you ignore other...

Read More

Fear of Death and Letting Go

The closest experience I have to death is when our second daughter was born. It was an extremely fast and easy birth. But afterward, I started to experience pain. It did not feel normal to me, but I was told it was normal. The pain kept getting worse. The uterine massage wasn’t helping. The attending physician seemed to think I was overreacting, but I knew I wasn’t okay. It felt like my life force was slipping away.   The nurse realized something was not right. She didn’t say anything, but I remember that she stopped me from eating. I was under the...

Read More

Love Is Not Only The Answer; It Is Also The Question And Everything Else In Between

Angus and I are hopefully heading back to LA as this blog post is being sent out. I am so used to writing my posts right before they get sent it feels strange to write something that won’t be published until two weeks from now.   One of the things that I noticed this week, is I can get a bit antsy before leaving on a trip. I usually deal with this by leaving packing to the last minute. This works for me because then I don’t spend that much time thinking about it so there is less time to worry. This...

Read More

Help When Struggling with Anxious Intrusive Thoughts

This week's vlog answers a question sent to us: "I wake up with severe anxiety. I get flooded with negative thoughts the moment I wake up. I try to push the thoughts away, but I start my day with these thoughts, and I hate it. What are your thoughts on this?" Watch to find out how to have less suffering from anxiety.   Angus & Rohini Ross are "the Rewilders". They love working with couples and helping them to reduce conflict and discord in their relationships by opening them up to their innate vitality and resilience. They work with couples who are...

Read More

The Sneakiness of Busyness and Self-Importance

I’m back in LA enjoying a cozy rainy day after participating in Barb Patterson’s Business Accelerator program. The experience was a great example of what is possible when one is willing to step into the unknown and see what emerges from a clean slate. To say I was surprised by what came forward is an understatement.   I went in knowing something felt off regarding my work, but I had no idea what. As Angus and I explored our ideas related to helping couples rewild their relationships everything felt fresh and alive. We are committed to moving forward with the book....

Read More