Blog Archives | Rohini Ross - Part 3
 

Blog Archives

Navigating Irreconcilable Differences. Why Bother Trying?

Angus and I have been hearing from people who are implementing the guidance we share in our Rewilding Love podcast and experiencing shifts in their relationships. One of the reviews said the approach is working like magic. We have also heard how the issues we discuss such as trying to change your partner or navigating anger feel like we are speaking directly to the listener. This shows how universal relationship challenges are. But one of the pieces of feedback that stood out to me was about how dire the relationship in the podcast sounds. And the question was, "Wouldn’t it...

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Ten Relationship Basics

I’ve written about how I used to be super-sensitive in my relationship with Angus and how that created a negative downward spiral between us, with each of us adding more negativity to our communication with each other and slashing the feeling of goodwill between us in the process. . I would blame him for how I felt. I thought if only he were kinder and less irritable then I would be happier. I would voice my criticism. He would take my criticism personally and become less kind and more irritable in the process. . We managed to create a negative amount of goodwill in...

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Peel Off the Persona and Embrace All of Who You Are

I feel like I am on a growing edge and ready to see something new beyond my conditioned beliefs around people-pleasing, being liked, and being a good girl. To my horror, my sense of arrogance and superiority is becoming more visible to me. I have spent years in the comfortable familiarity of my feelings of unworthiness, but my consciousness is shifting focus to a more painful realization of my attitudes and beliefs of being superior and special.   I feel sick writing it down. My self-loathing is strong.   On a recent webinar where I was a guest speaker, Natasha Swerdloff spoke of vanity...

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Lessons Learned Making the Podcast Rewilding Love

This is not a post about how to make a podcast. This post is about inner learnings that have unfolded through the course of making a podcast that may be helpful or of interest.   They are:   The Power of Resolve Relationship Learning on Steroids It Takes a Team   The Power of Resolve   I often write about the importance of listening to the still quiet voice within and following the inner promptings. Seth Godin wrote a post recently that said, “Qarrtsiluni...

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The Importance of Presence

We are excited that our podcast Rewilding Love is launching next Tuesday, November 24th! We hope you will join us on the twists and turns of the journey with Alicia and Mateo as they decide whether or not they should stay or go in their marriage. And for this week after a deleted audio file debacle, Angus realized how detrimental a busy mind is and embraced presence more intentionally. This is a learning curve for both of us, and it makes a huge difference to the quality of our relationship as well.   Angus & Rohini Ross are “The Rewilders.” Listen to...

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Shame Begone

When I was in high school I went on a field trip to an International High School that was a boarding school near the village where I lived. Students attended the high school from all over the world. As part of the field trip, the students from my school played a game.   We were divided into teams and given different roles to play within the world order. There were country leaders, national advisers, and spies. I was the leader of a first-world nation with the highest GDP. It was obviously meant to represent the U.S. One of my closest friends who...

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I Don’t Need To Be Part of Your Meltdown

It seems obvious that it is fine to let someone have their emotional experience and give them space to have the dignity of their own experience, and even though we both know this intellectually we still can find ourselves getting pulled into each other's emotional reactivity at times trying to fix things with the seeming intent of helping the other person. But really it is more to do with the discomfort of being around the other person and their emotions. Rohini woke up in the middle of one of the moments and realized, "I don't need to be part of...

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Time to Heal

Saturday morning Angus and I were pottering around. I had a supervision call with participants in my Rewilding Guide and after we were going meet up with the couple we were doing an intensive with. We were making tea and taking care of the pets. Angus turned on CNN. The previous night when we were watching we heard the announcement “LIVE ELECTION UPDATE” several times and were told information like 30 votes have come in from a county in Pennsylvania or Georgia. So when Wolf Blitzer announced another election update at 8:30 am neither one of us was particularly excited....

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Patience, Impatience, and Wellbeing

Rohini noticed how she had been lacking patience this week and realized it only happens when she forgets her wellbeing is found within. Angus uses his experience of being in the circular inferno of driving around LAX as a metaphor for what happens when he is grappling for control. Impatience is a normal part of the human experience, and it is a signal that lets us know the mind is spinning.   Angus & Rohini Ross are "the Rewilders." They love working with couples and helping them to reduce conflict and discord in their relationships by pointing them to their innate wisdom...

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Water Rage

I am not allowed to be pissed off. I can’t be angry. Rage is forbidden. No wonder I am claustrophobic. I am suffocated by the pressure of my rules squeezing me tight like a boa constrictor, squeezing the life out of me. I get to live life as a sucked out shell with a smile on my face. I aim to please.   That is how I earn my worth. I am of service. Let me help you. I will make you happy. I am a service professional at the age of 14 busing tables, bringing bread, and fetching water. I get...

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