Blog Archives | Rohini Ross - Part 30
 

Blog Archives

Do You Ever Feel Worthless and Insecure and Want to Feel Better?

Are you struggling with feelings of insecurity? Does it look like these feelings get in the way of your success and being able to relax and enjoy your life?   I can absolutely relate. I used to be driven by my feelings of insecurity. I tried to outrun them by working hard. I pushed. I strived. I forced myself. I punished myself. I felt not good enough, and I believed I needed to work my way out of my low self-esteem. Self-improvement was my focus.   That was my coping mechanism. I got lots of positive acknowledgments from this on the outside. I...

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He Said, She Said: More on Angus’ Absentmindedness

This time Angus keeps his pants on but loses a baby. In order for our relationship to work, I needed to learn that my wellbeing was not dependent on Angus having a good memory or being focused. It looked like it was for many years, but finally, I got to see more clearly that my upset was not coming from his behavior. This helped me to get over my frustration and incredulity so much more quickly and accept Angus as he is, absentmindedness included. It was better for us and better for me! Do you have something in your life...

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What’s Driving Your Behavior Your Shoulds or Your Inspiration?

I promise this is not a paid testimonial. Barb Patterson is a colleague and good friend. She is also a brilliant coach and a genius when it comes to business development. I love working with her in our Masterminds for Solopreneurs, and a few weeks ago, I got the personal benefit of participating in a Business Accelerator with her. It was a beta test, and Barb knocked it out of the park. I learned from her and all of the other participants. What the group did was help me get perspective on my business. I hadn’t realized I had been...

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He Said, She Said: Becoming Less Reactive to Criticism

Angus and I usually get a deeper understanding of the Principles before we present a workshop. This time we each got to learn from seeing how we can get reactive with each other related to brainstorming. From seeing this, we were able to take our sensitivities more lightly. This allowed the workshop preparation process to be so much more kind and fun. I had room for Angus to be sensitive to my comments and didn't take it personally if he got prickly. This allowed him to see he was reacting to his own thinking and not me. We each got...

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He Said, She Said: Authenticity in Relationships

In this week's Vlog, we point to the importance of authenticity for experiencing intimacy in relationships. This may be obvious, but it is not always easy. And sometimes it is invisible to us when we are not showing up in an honest way.   The opportunity for me is to trust in both Angus's and my resilience so I speak up rather than soldiering on and maintaining an unhealthy status quo. When I do this I am usually surprised by how easy it is to share what is important.   Let me know what supports intimacy in your relationships. And if you would like to...

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He Said, She Said: Eliminating Relationship Baggage

Angus recalls the time I barricaded him out of our apartment, and then my therapist told me I had abandonment issues. Angus thought he brought his own baggage to our relationship as well. We both accepted these limitations as part of who we were and resigned ourselves to a challenging relationship because of them.   We are both so grateful to the understanding of the principles that helps us see that we don't have issues. All we have is thought in the moment that temporarily gets in the way of us experiencing peace of mind and our true loving nature. It was...

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Becoming Discouragement Proof and Appreciating The Unknown

A typical learning curve has a slow beginning followed by steep acceleration until it eventually evens out into a plateau. Here is an example of what one looks like: Today I am writing about the slow beginning stage. It is common when I work with clients for them to be hard on themselves and to become discouraged during this stage. I hear comments like: “I don’t know what I’m doing.” “I’m stuck.” “Nothing is happening!” “I’m doing it wrong.” There is a frequent misconception that more information is needed at this time to help figure out how to reach the acceleration...

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He Said, She Said: Problems Are a State of Mind

Do you have a problem in your life? Angus thought he had a real problem when our rescue pup Niko would not let us sit on the couch without jumping on us and biting us. He wasn’t aggressive. He was just trying to play. But his play was rough, and he wouldn’t stop. His teeth would leave bruises and even draw blood. Our attempts to discipline him were futile. When we tried to stop him, he thought we were playing, and this excited him and gave him more energy to keep going. He also had not been crated trained so...

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Being an Imperfect Mother is Good for Your Kids

I heard one of my teacher's at the University of Santa Monica, Ron Hulnick Ph.D. say that you cannot damage your kids. This flies in the face of traditional psychology that believes a healthy attachment to the primary caregiver is what results in well-adjusted and happy children. However, from a spiritual perspective, if we all have innate well-being and mental health within us, if our essence is whole and cannot be damaged, then our environment and circumstances would not be able to damage us.   Knowing this does not make me not want to show us as the best parent I can be,...

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He Said, She Said: Angus’s Screen Saver Mode

Angus shares how he needs time to rev up in the mornings, and how when he chills, he goes into screen saver mode. This mode can result in communication problems with Rohini because she thinks Angus's brain is fully functioning when it is actually off-line. Angus sees the benefit of letting her know when he needs space so he doesn't get resentful and so there aren't misunderstandings. Join Angus and Rohini at their upcoming workshop in Topanga April 28-29. Click here for more information.   Angus and Rohini are both coaches. They work with individuals, leaders, and organizations to increase performance and success....

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