Love | Rohini Ross - Part 9

Rule Breaker and Rule Follower

Thank you to everyone who has reached out to check in with Angus and me regarding our safety and for offering your support while we were evacuated. We are very grateful for your love and kindness. We are safe and have not been impacted by the fire other than the evacuation. Many others, however, have not been as fortunate. If you would like to offer support here are some charities to choose from:   Wildfire Relief Fund   Disaster Relief Fund   Caring Choices   California Fire Foundation   Rohini and Angus are both coaches. They work with individuals, leaders, and organizations to increase performance and success. They also love...

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Invisible State of Mind

It amazes me that my state of mind can be invisible to me. What I mean by that is that in my perception I think I am okay and in my right mind, but actually, I am destabilized. It is obvious to me when I am feeling extremes of upset, but what I share about in the Vlog is more subtle. Now I know when Angus says I am being stern, critical or on my high horse, he is probably right. He is picking up on my feeling state.   Normally I think he is the crazy one and just out of...

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The “D” Word

The "D" word is something that Angus and I used to consider frequently. I didn't even know it was on his mind as much as mine until this Vlog. I was just more vocal about it. Now, however, it isn't even a consideration for either of us.   The big game changer for us was seeing that a low mood is an indicator to not take our thinking seriously. We would only ever end up coming to the conclusion that divorce was the answer when we were in a low mood state. We have both learned not to think about what looks...

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Shouting is Moaning on Steroids

Shouting is the new moaning and another great example of how we each live in our separate realities. In Angus' world, he was not shouting. In my world, he was shouting at me. Fortunately, I had perspective and didn’t take it personally this time, but I do have a preference not to be shouted at. Angus was able to hear this and recognize it is possible to not yell at the messenger. His other lesson was to be realistic about the outcome of giving his credit card to a teenager doing dorm room shopping. And Niko makes a guest appearance to remind...

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Time to Get Off My Soapbox!

Sometimes Angus feels compelled to have a moan, and sometimes I'm not able to be a good listener when he does. Rather than holding a loving space and saying "There, there, darling.", I get concerned and try to school him. This usually doesn't go well. So Angus decides it would be good for him to have a virtual assistant he can moan to, but he gets himself into hot water when he uses a term I take exception to.   Rohini and Angus are both coaches. They work with individuals, leaders, and organizations to increase performance and success. They also love working...

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Low Moods No Longer Bring My Life to a Halt

I don’t know what I have been searching for on the internet lately, but now my Facebook ads are about pee proof underwear and vaginal dryness solutions. I remember reading in a book about big data how parents found out their teenage daughter was pregnant because their Target flyers started showing baby items. It is not a big step from menopause to mortality, and this has been underlined by the death of a college friend after a brave fight against cancer.   Moments of recognition about the finite quality of life can be sobering. It has caused me to reflect on my...

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Sometimes Shame Gets the Better of Us

Angus shares how he feels he did a bad job with public speaking. I point out that it is impossible for him to know how he did when he is experiencing so much self-judgment. It is easy to be hard on ourselves when we are gripped by our thoughts of shame and feeling the effect of them. Going over what happened does not help. It breathes more life into the critical thoughts and results in more intense feelings of shame and less perspective. The best way we have found to navigate shame is to recognize when what we are thinking...

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How the Principles Helped Me Go From One Foot Out the Door to Being “All In” in my Marriage

In this 3PGC webinar, Rohini speaks to how the understanding of the Principles transformed her relationship with herself and her husband. Instead of being at the effect of her insecure thinking, she was able to find an inner foundation of security that allowed her to be “all-in” in her marriage and her life.   Become a 3PGC member: http://www.3pgc.org and receive all the email announcements about the webinars and more.   Rohini Ross is the founder and presenter of The Soul-Centered Series: Psychology, Spirituality and the Teachings of Sydney Banks that starts October 2018 in Santa Monica, CA. She is passionate about helping people...

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Low Moods Pass Naturally

Our thinking can get really stirred up at times. The main warning sign that this is happening is a low mood. Low moods, however, don’t mean anything about us. They are temporary states of mind and will naturally pass. The less we do anything about them, and the less we try to fix our mood, the quicker we find ourselves back at normal. It is, however, helpful to know when our thinking is stirred up. We can then take that into consideration as we live life. If Angus had taken this into account, he might have paid more attention when...

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The Goal is Not to Change Emotional Experience, Just Remember the Source that Creates It

I have noticed how I can be critical. I can be sharp. I don’t mean to be, but I can have an edge. This occurs when my personal thinking is stirred up. I am feeling separate. My “I” is strong. Then other times when my thinking is more settled my “I” softens and my heart opens. I feel connected and more peaceful.   I am struck by the benefit of the understanding of the principles for pointing out how I can be more neutral about not just being the soft “I” with the expanded heart. I put less pressure on myself...

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