Rohini is Just So Forward

In this week’s Vlog, you get to see how Rohini's ability to take on the journey of life and course correct like a nimble sloop has shown a lot more virtue than Angus’ steady as you go freight ship! Rohini’s will to get out on the open sea as quickly as possible proves to be a lot more fruitful than Angus’ need to stay in the harbor worrying about the Leviathan.   Rohini and Angus are both coaches. They work with individuals, leaders, and organizations to increase performance and success. They also love working with couples and helping them reduce conflict and...

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Help, I Am Hurting! Where is My Peace of Mind?

When I found myself writing similar messages to clients who were experiencing distress and who reached out for support, I thought it might be helpful to share my thoughts with a wider audience. Let me know in the comments if what I am sharing is helpful or if you have questions.   When you are upset it looks like another person or a circumstance is the cause of your distress. Your emotions make this feel very real. It does not occur to you that your experience is created inside of you. It is hard to have perspective and see that your thinking...

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Bossiness is in the Eye of the Beholder

This is not an example of Angus at his best with listening. He normally does a better job of disguising his inattentiveness, but it is a good example of how we each live in our own separate reality. I can think I am being helpful and Angus can think I am bossy. What is even more amazing is I can be doing the same thing and from one state of mind, Angus can see me as helpful and from another state of mind he can see me as bossy. I can also be completely blind to my bossiness and see...

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He Said, She Said: Separate Realities and Germs

Angus and I live in separate realities when it comes to dirt and germs. He has a lot more thinking about them than I do. His coping mechanism for dealing with all that thought is hand sanitizer and hand washing. We aren’t going to see things the same way any time soon, but we have found a lighthearted way to be with each other about it. We can accept that reality looks different for us in this area and then find ways to navigate the differences that work for both of us.   I have to let go of my judgment that...

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He Said, She Said: Eliminating Relationship Baggage

Angus recalls the time I barricaded him out of our apartment, and then my therapist told me I had abandonment issues. Angus thought he brought his own baggage to our relationship as well. We both accepted these limitations as part of who we were and resigned ourselves to a challenging relationship because of them.   We are both so grateful to the understanding of the principles that helps us see that we don't have issues. All we have is thought in the moment that temporarily gets in the way of us experiencing peace of mind and our true loving nature. It was...

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He Said, She Said: Sex and Connection

Is it Shrek? Is it a giant and a pygmy in a shed, or is it Angus and Rohini in their sauna talking about what used to get in the way of sex? Or how even now they may have to navigate different levels of desire. As Angus says, it is all about connection. There is more than one way to get there, but that is what we both want.   And, I do know that Angus did not cause my resentment. I was just taking his behavior personally rather than being able to understand and have compassion for his suffering. If...

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He Said, She Said: More Peace, Less Reactivity

Angus shares how he is experiencing greater freedom from his reactive thoughts. He can have them without feeling compelled to act on them. I can certainly take a leaf out of his book. We are enjoying the peace and looking forward to a relaxing weekend of recharging!   Angus and Rohini are both coaches. They work with individuals, leaders, and organizations to increase performance and success. They also love working with couples and helping them reduce conflict and discord so they can experience more love and harmony in their relationships. They co-facilitate individualized three-day couples intensives that support the deepening of connection...

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He Said, She Said: Getting a Thicker Skin is Good for Relationships

Angus re-enacts a prank he played on me that he thought would be funny but that actually terrified me. I may not be ready for more pranks, but I have got a lot better about not taking things personally. This has made our relationship so much easier. I love the greater levels of light-heartedness we both experience simply from seeing the fluid nature of thought and experience and recognizing our natural tendency as human beings is to drop into feelings of love and wellbeing -- so reassuring!   Angus and Rohini are both coaches. They work with individuals, leaders and organizations to...

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In Celebration of Martin Luther King Jr. — Let Love Transform Us All

Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that. -- Martin Luther King, Jr.   Today is Martin Luther King Jr. day in the United States. It is a holiday that commemorates Dr. King's life and work. He lead a movement for racial justice and equality, and embraced nonviolent action as a powerful revolutionary force for social change. He employed Gandhi's philosophy of nonviolence as the means to confront racist laws and discrimination in America. His work made a significant contribution to President Lyndon Johnson signing into law the historic Civil Rights...

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He Said, She Said: Angus’s Big Problem in Our Marriage

Who knew Angus has a big problem with me?! It wasn't what I thought it would be. Of my many character weaknesses and personality quirks it was not on the top of my list. Just goes to show how we each live in our separate reality and see the world in our unique way that makes sense to us. WARNING: view discretion advised.   Angus and Rohini are both coaches. They work with individuals, leaders and organizations to increase performance and success. They also love working with couples and helping them reduce conflict and discord so they can experience more love and...

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