relationships | Rohini Ross - Part 18

He Said, She Said: Getting a Thicker Skin is Good for Relationships

Angus re-enacts a prank he played on me that he thought would be funny but that actually terrified me. I may not be ready for more pranks, but I have got a lot better about not taking things personally. This has made our relationship so much easier. I love the greater levels of light-heartedness we both experience simply from seeing the fluid nature of thought and experience and recognizing our natural tendency as human beings is to drop into feelings of love and wellbeing -- so reassuring!   Angus and Rohini are both coaches. They work with individuals, leaders and organizations to...

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He Said, She Said: Not Feasting on Negative Thoughts

I forced Angus to throw me a 50th birthday party against his will. You will find out what a mean wife I am. Angus also shares some pearls of wisdom about not feasting on his negative thoughts.     Angus and Rohini are both coaches. They work with individuals, leaders and organizations to increase performance and success. They also love working with couples and helping them reduce conflict and discord so they can experience more love and harmony in their relationships. They co-facilitate individualized three-day couples intensives that support the deepening of connection and understanding. They work with couples who are struggling and...

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He Said, She Said: One Year Vlog Anniversary

We are celebrating ?? our one year anniversary of doing the Vlog! Thank you for all of you support and kindness! ?? ? We so appreciate being in this exploration with YOU. It is music to our ears when we here the Vlog has been helpful or even that it has simply brought you a smile. And Angus did realize the song is by Human League and not The Killers. ? Sending you love!   Angus and Rohini are both coaches. They work with individuals, leaders and organizations to increase performance and success. They also love working with couples and helping them reduce conflict and discord so they can...

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Owning Anger to Find More Peace in Marriage

My husband Angus said to me recently that I have not been myself. He said I have had more an edge, been more critical, more impatient, more controlling, and more condescending than usual. What surprised me is that I had not noticed it. I didn't think I was perfect, but I also didn't think I was any different than usual.   We all have our blind spots. Someone might talk over people and not notice it, another person might not listen and still think they are a good listener, for me I often don't see my anger. I notice it in my...

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He Said, She Said: The Quiet Nest Before the Empty Nest

I am missing spending more time with our teenage girls as their lives are so busy. Angus reminds me of how normal and healthy this is. I see now that my struggle could be perceived as a criticism of them and give the message that they are doing something wrong. My opportunity is to get more comfortable with the quiet nest so they know everything is okay and on track, and to look for the opportunities we do have to enjoy each others company. Angus has an opportunity to accept his bad hair day and not compensate with "hat hair".   Angus...

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He Said, She Said: Angus’s Big Problem in Our Marriage

Who knew Angus has a big problem with me?! It wasn't what I thought it would be. Of my many character weaknesses and personality quirks it was not on the top of my list. Just goes to show how we each live in our separate reality and see the world in our unique way that makes sense to us. WARNING: view discretion advised.   Angus and Rohini are both coaches. They work with individuals, leaders and organizations to increase performance and success. They also love working with couples and helping them reduce conflict and discord so they can experience more love and...

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He Said, She Said: Fighting sucks, but it is not the end of the world

We thought we would get more sleep with teenagers. They don't wake up until noon when they are on vacation, but we forgot the flip side of the late nights. Angus and I were feeling a little worse for wear from lack of sleep, and we really got duped by our reactive thinking. We both fell into believing it, and woke up believing too. That is highly unusual for us now, but it happened nonetheless. We eventually settled. We finally saw each other more clearly, and felt the love that is.   It can be scary when this happens. The intensity of...

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He Said, She Said: Freedom From Expectations

Angus shares what a relief it is to not feel any pressure to find the best party ever. Life is so much more enjoyable when we aren't trying to live up to expectations. We then get to be present and really enjoy what is right in front of us. Wishing everyone a Happy New Year! Sending you love!   Angus and Rohini are both coaches. They work with individuals, leaders and organizations to increase performance and success. They also love working with couples and helping them reduce conflict and discord so they can experience more love and harmony in their relationships. They...

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The Benefits of Being “All In” in Relationships and Life

Recently I have been surrounded by loss in my life and in my clients' lives. Recognizing the temporary and fragile nature of life has a way of clarifying priorities. In Bronnie Ware's book The Top Five Regrets of the Dying, she shares that most prevalent regrets of the people she worked with in palliative care are:   I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me. I wish I hadn't worked so hard. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings. I wish I had stayed in touch with...

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Half a Cup of Criticism and a Gallon of Vitriol

A recipe for relationship disaster, but with the understanding that these dire moments are only temporary, and they do not reflect the love that is real, it is much easier to get over resentment and upset. Our marriage is so much more fun and easy now we don't take our worst moments seriously. We recognize they are only a reflection of being temporarily destabilized. It is a relief to have room for our humanness in our marriage and to see the amazing ability we have to bounce back and feel the love in our hearts.   Angus and Rohini are both coaches....

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