love and relationships | Rohini Ross - Part 14

He Said, She Said: Becoming Less Reactive to Criticism

Angus and I usually get a deeper understanding of the Principles before we present a workshop. This time we each got to learn from seeing how we can get reactive with each other related to brainstorming. From seeing this, we were able to take our sensitivities more lightly. This allowed the workshop preparation process to be so much more kind and fun. I had room for Angus to be sensitive to my comments and didn't take it personally if he got prickly. This allowed him to see he was reacting to his own thinking and not me. We each got...

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He Said, She Said: Eliminating Relationship Baggage

Angus recalls the time I barricaded him out of our apartment, and then my therapist told me I had abandonment issues. Angus thought he brought his own baggage to our relationship as well. We both accepted these limitations as part of who we were and resigned ourselves to a challenging relationship because of them.   We are both so grateful to the understanding of the principles that helps us see that we don't have issues. All we have is thought in the moment that temporarily gets in the way of us experiencing peace of mind and our true loving nature. It was...

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He Said, She Said: Angus’s Screen Saver Mode

Angus shares how he needs time to rev up in the mornings, and how when he chills, he goes into screen saver mode. This mode can result in communication problems with Rohini because she thinks Angus's brain is fully functioning when it is actually off-line. Angus sees the benefit of letting her know when he needs space so he doesn't get resentful and so there aren't misunderstandings. Join Angus and Rohini at their upcoming workshop in Topanga April 28-29. Click here for more information.   Angus and Rohini are both coaches. They work with individuals, leaders, and organizations to increase performance and success....

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He Said, She Said: Sex and Connection

Is it Shrek? Is it a giant and a pygmy in a shed, or is it Angus and Rohini in their sauna talking about what used to get in the way of sex? Or how even now they may have to navigate different levels of desire. As Angus says, it is all about connection. There is more than one way to get there, but that is what we both want.   And, I do know that Angus did not cause my resentment. I was just taking his behavior personally rather than being able to understand and have compassion for his suffering. If...

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He Said, She Said: More Peace, Less Reactivity

Angus shares how he is experiencing greater freedom from his reactive thoughts. He can have them without feeling compelled to act on them. I can certainly take a leaf out of his book. We are enjoying the peace and looking forward to a relaxing weekend of recharging!   Angus and Rohini are both coaches. They work with individuals, leaders, and organizations to increase performance and success. They also love working with couples and helping them reduce conflict and discord so they can experience more love and harmony in their relationships. They co-facilitate individualized three-day couples intensives that support the deepening of connection...

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He Said, She Said: Getting a Thicker Skin is Good for Relationships

Angus re-enacts a prank he played on me that he thought would be funny but that actually terrified me. I may not be ready for more pranks, but I have got a lot better about not taking things personally. This has made our relationship so much easier. I love the greater levels of light-heartedness we both experience simply from seeing the fluid nature of thought and experience and recognizing our natural tendency as human beings is to drop into feelings of love and wellbeing -- so reassuring!   Angus and Rohini are both coaches. They work with individuals, leaders and organizations to...

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He Said, She Said: Angus’s Big Problem in Our Marriage

Who knew Angus has a big problem with me?! It wasn't what I thought it would be. Of my many character weaknesses and personality quirks it was not on the top of my list. Just goes to show how we each live in our separate reality and see the world in our unique way that makes sense to us. WARNING: view discretion advised.   Angus and Rohini are both coaches. They work with individuals, leaders and organizations to increase performance and success. They also love working with couples and helping them reduce conflict and discord so they can experience more love and...

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He Said, She Said: Fighting sucks, but it is not the end of the world

We thought we would get more sleep with teenagers. They don't wake up until noon when they are on vacation, but we forgot the flip side of the late nights. Angus and I were feeling a little worse for wear from lack of sleep, and we really got duped by our reactive thinking. We both fell into believing it, and woke up believing too. That is highly unusual for us now, but it happened nonetheless. We eventually settled. We finally saw each other more clearly, and felt the love that is.   It can be scary when this happens. The intensity of...

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Half a Cup of Criticism and a Gallon of Vitriol

A recipe for relationship disaster, but with the understanding that these dire moments are only temporary, and they do not reflect the love that is real, it is much easier to get over resentment and upset. Our marriage is so much more fun and easy now we don't take our worst moments seriously. We recognize they are only a reflection of being temporarily destabilized. It is a relief to have room for our humanness in our marriage and to see the amazing ability we have to bounce back and feel the love in our hearts.   Angus and Rohini are both coaches....

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He Said, She Said: Gratitude

Angus and I are very grateful for you! Hope you had a lovely Thanksgiving if you celebrated yesterday. We enjoyed a get together with friends. In the Vlog, Angus reminisces about the old days when I would get anxious if we didn't have some where to go for Thanksgiving and then goes off on a tangent about a yoga retreat I dragged him to and then abandoned him at. But the most important part of the Vlog is our gratitude for you! Sending you love!   Angus and Rohini are both coaches. They work with individuals, leaders and organizations to increase performance...

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