You Are Enough — No Matter What Experience You Create for Yourself | Rohini Ross
You Are Enough -- No Matter What Experience You Create for Yourself

You Are Enough — No Matter What Experience You Create for Yourself

I have just finished co-facilitating a training with Linda Pransky. What an amazing weekend! It was so much fun to work with her and to share with the attendees the simplicity of the Three Principles. I am left with feeling deep gratitude for the opportunity to be myself and to connect with others being themselves, knowing this in itself is healing. The focus of the training was working with others from the understanding of the Three Principles. These principles were articulated by Sydney Banks after his enlightenment experience. They provide a description of how human psychological functioning works, and are a way of pointing toward the formless, spiritual nature behind life.


Linda gave a beautiful explanation of the principles this weekend. She shared that mind is the energy behind life from which we create thought. We get a 3D experience of our thoughts via consciousness, and are able bring our thoughts to life through our nervous system. This is how we create our experience. We are the three principles in motion. 


When looking at how to work with others from this understanding, the Three Principles demonstrate how healing is the result of fresh thought and seeing anew. It is an inner process that has nothing to do with effort or using a technique. It comes from getting a new perspective. From the principles, we see that our experience is only ever temporary and the result of illusory thought. When we are able to see this, whatever is troubling us no longer looks real. It can be seen as thought that is changeable, and the problem shrinks down to size. We do not experience circumstances. We feel our thinking. Therefore, our experience changes as soon as our thoughts do, independent of what happens outside of us.


I can feel angry one moment and happy another moment with nothing changing on the outside, simply a change of my thinking on the inside.


This understanding is not limited to the reduction of psychological suffering, but it also applies to any shift in behavior or improvement in performance we want to achieve. We all behave in accordance with our understanding, and our results reflect that. If my understanding is that I am unworthy and incapable, my behavior with reflect that. If my understanding is that I am a worthy exactly as I am, my results will reflect that. Therefore, if I want to experience change in any area of my life, I need to look in the direction of my understanding and not focus on the outside. The results that I create occur after the fact of thought. They are the by-product. If I want to change the results, I need to look in the direction of where they come from — my understanding.


I can’t, however, make my understanding change. That happens naturally, in its own timing, when insight occurs. It is independent of my effort. So I may as well enjoy wherever I am at in my understanding with whatever experience I am having because, no matter what, growth in consciousness is occurring.


When working with clients, I always remind myself that their growth in consciousness is occurring independent of me. I am not responsible for making my clients have a shift in understanding. Their transformation comes from inside of them. My work is to explain to them how they create their experience and how the shift happens. This gives them hope that it is possible for change to occur. When my clients are able to understand how easy it is for their understanding to shift, they are able to relax. They let go and realize they are actually okay exactly as they are. The problem is not with themselves. The only problem is the judgments they make against themselves and the coping mechanisms they use to deal with the pain and suffering of the judgments they hold against themselves. 


I used to have a habit of picking and chewing my cuticles. It was something I did when I felt overwhelmed or stressed out. I judged myself as damaged for having this habit. It wasn’t just a little picking. It would result in pain, blood, and unsightly hands. My husband felt concerned for my sanity. I felt ashamed because of my behavior. I saw it as proof of my unworthiness as a human being. I saw myself as separate from everyone else because I had this habit. I desperately wanted to stop, but I couldn’t. It was a compulsive behavior that had me.


When I finally saw that I was worthy whether or not I picked or chewed my cuticles, I stopped caring about whether I did the behavior or not. When my worthiness had nothing to with my finger picking, the compulsion went away. I first stopped caring about whether or not I did it, and then I noticed that I stopped doing it. The stopping was effortless. Once I let go of the judgment, the behavior changed. My understanding shifted and the results followed. I do still do it from time to time, but I don’t feel the shame, and it doesn’t progress the way it used to. Amy Johnson’s book, The Little Book of Big Change, is the best book I have read illustrating the dynamics of how habits change!


This weekend Linda and I encouraged everyone to look away from the tyranny of insecure thinking that tells us that we are not good enough, and pointed everyone, ourselves included, to look in the direction of seeing that we are the thinkers. Therefore, we are the authors of our experience. No matter what our experience is, we create it, and we change it. And, we can know, no matter what experience we create for ourselves, that we are enough, exactly as I we are. This frees us from the cruelty of our insecure thinking, and allows us to experience the wisdom of our heart. We, then, get to connect with the peace, love, inspiration, and creativity of our true nature. Until we forget, and buy into the illusion of our distorted thoughts, but we always have the opportunity to think again, to see anew, and remember the truth of who we are.


Rohini Ross is a psychotherapist, a leadership consultant, and an executive coach. She helps individuals, couples, and professionals to connect more fully with their true nature so they can experience greater levels of wellbeing, resiliency, and success. Her years as a therapist give her significant insight regarding the impact and importance of state of mind on fulfilling potential. She supports her clients with achieving success both personally and professionally. You can find out more about Rohini’s work on her website,


  • Anthony Minko

    24.10.2016 at 04:14 Reply

    What a wonderful blog, Rohini!! I love the way you explain the principles and then explain what they illustrate about personal growth and lasting change. Great to read about the common frustration and self-critical judgment involved in trying to change our less-than-perfect thoughts and feelings… vs. finding our own spiritual patience to let the growth unfold within us through new thoughts and feelings, and a deeper understanding of the nature of our experience. Great message for the start of a new week! As always, thanks for sharing your insight!!

    • Rohini

      24.10.2016 at 08:27 Reply

      Hi Anthony,

      Thank you so much for your comment! I appreciate your feedback! I especially love how you articulate the difference between pushing and striving and allowing, “trying to change our less-than-perfect thoughts and feelings … vs. finding our own spiritual patience to let the growth unfold within us through new thoughts and feelings, and a deeper understanding of the nature of our experience.” Beautifully stated!

      Love, Rohini

  • Grace

    24.10.2016 at 23:45 Reply

    Love this Rohini. I’ve seen how my own judgements lead to habits and how the habit looks like the way I can settle my thinking in that moment. Thank You for your sharing this xxxx

    • Rohini

      25.10.2016 at 18:04 Reply

      Dear Grace, Thank you so much for your comment! I am so glad you are experiencing the freedom of seeing habits for what they are.

      Love, Rohini

  • Kerri Stuart

    11.11.2016 at 06:46 Reply

    I read your blog for the first time yesterday about the first ten years of marriage and while reading, I felt like you were describing me, the state I am right now, where you were way back when. It truly resonated with me and brought me to your website where I find your insights quite endearing. While I understand I cannot force these new thoughts, I will try to let go and allow new thoughts to come in. I would truly love to be the best version of me, but I know I need to reduce my self-judgment and understand I am worthy of my life and the things I have accomplished. Thank you for sharing!

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